Each Monday, we review the douchiest stuff in sports.
1. THE 2007 MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL POSTSEASON -- RRROOOOOARRRRR! JESUS CHRIST. Dear God, are we angry at the crappy, bland, anticlimactic pile of possum vomit that called itself the MLB Playoffs.
Where do we begin? First there was the scheduling. Games on back-to-back days here, a day off there –
We’re not even close to done. There was
Fuck you, Kevin Millar. You said you didn’t want a trade out of
Let’s not even talk about A-Rod and Scott Boras. But speaking of that, everyone who made a huge deal over them is just as douchey.
Free taco promotions from Taco Bell? Last time we checked, the MLB Playoffs weren’t appearing after the Sylvester Stallone marathon on the USA Network.
You know what would’ve been cool? If every series wasn’t a god-damned sweep. One series went seven games and every other series went four games or less. It made a lot of playoff prognosticators look mentally challenged.
Good riddance, MLB Playoffs. We hate you like we hate new Simpsons episodes.
3. GUY BERTRAND – The Quebec-based lawyer is upset because Canadiens captain Saku Koivu doesn’t speak French, arguing it’s disrespectful since the forward has played in
4. O.J. SIMPSON’S FRIENDS – Where’s the loyalty? What a bunch of Judases.
5. BARRY BONDS – Oooh, big man. Boycotting the Hall of Fame. Clearly this is a pre-emptive strike. The day
6. THE CANADIAN FOOTBALL LEAGUE – Luca Congi was stripped of his All-Star selection after the CFL announced it had miscounted votes and accidentally awarded the kicker a place on the team. Time for a new abacus, guys.
8. THE TOUR DE