Thursday, July 19, 2007

We'd boom boom tap that

Has nobody noticed Under Armour’s new ad campaign for its girls clothing line, or are they just too afraid to say anything? It features a series of highlights of high school chicks getting hot and sweaty and bouncing around in sports bras.

We ourselves weren’t really sure how to approach this post, given the touchy nature of the young lasses, so we sought the advice of Davey A., a friend of the website:

“Just be sure you write it as if it’s incredible in how the video is making preteens sexy, not incredible in how preteens are sexy.”

Sensible advice as always, Dave. Seriously, though -- how is it even legal for Under Armour to produce this thing? Can they possibly justify making men our age have certain “thoughts” about fit, nubile girls that age? Then again, maybe the video isn’t even that bad. While Hurk immediately started building a roster of statutory rape jokes, Larkin merely rolled his eyes and turned back to his septuagenarian porn (though he did agree the gratuitous crotch shot of spandex-clad volleyball players at the end of the video was a bit much).

Either way, at least if you’ve ever wondered what a middle school run by Marcus Vick would look like, now you know.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I didn't think it was that bad - but this is coming from a girl. My dad didn't think it was that bad either... but he might also have been lying to me, and/or didn't think it was that bad cause he really thought it was GREAT.

The only shot that might be questionable IS the crotch shot near the end (and maybe the ass shot near the middle).

Hayesism said...

because my work cpu will only start in "safe mode" (note: you left me a FUCKING USELESS computer, larkin) i can't hear any sound for the youtube videos.
which, in this video's case, is absolutely fine by me.

Chad Nevett said...

Eh, not that bad, really. The odd shot may be questionable, but in a one-minute commercial about a girls' line of sports clothing if you only get a second or two at most of questionable shots, I'd say you're doing pretty good. It would be impossible to avoid the subject altogether, but they seem to do their best.

Anonymous said...

Yeah sorry guys...I think the fact that you actually found this video questionable just goes to show us exactly how one track your minds really are. ;) haha not that we really had any doubt. It's girls playing sports, in their sports gear....they're hardly marketing uber sexed up pre-teens....with only one sports bra shot and maybe a couple weird angles with the vball girls I'd say they did a pretty good job of showing young girls being fit and athletic.

Essentially I think it comes down to..... get your mind out of the gutter boys. Sporty doesn't always mean slutty or provocative.

Unknown said...

Ahahaha Hayes, you have to promise me a good "Fucking Pinwheel!" rant when I get back to London in the office.

Anonymous said...

I don't think it's that bad either.

What's worse, frankly, is that they depict women's sports has having fans at the games.

A packed house for a 16-year-old girls field hockey game? Not likely.

Matt Larkin said...

Hayes -- sorry about the comp...hahaha! Yeah, it's a piece of shit eh. Does it freeze every time you leave it unattended for 10 minutes or more?

Doc - hilarious comment re: attendance at the field hockey games.

See you guys tomorrow night,

Matt

Anonymous said...

These girls are NOT preteens...and they ARE sexy.