Last night's studs:
1. CRAIG BIGGIO AND FRANK THOMAS -- Blah blah blah record blah blah blah amazing accomplishment blah blah blah history blah blah blah legend blah blah blah Hall of Fame blah blah blah Biggio didn't fully earn the record considering he's barely good enough to crack a roster now but they kept sticking him in the lineup to help him get 3,000 blah blah blah Thomas is gonna mash the second half blah blah blah.
2. BASHIR LEVINGSTON -- The defensive back set a high school, er, CFL record for longest return last night after he snatched Paul McCallum's field goal miss and took it 129 yards to the house. Does this play reek of CFL or what? Not only did McCallum miss a 32-YARDER, Levingston caught the entire Lions squad napping and waltzed longer than anyone has ever waltzed to the endzone. We miss NFL Europa already.
3. CARLOS LEE -- His grand slam against the Rockies last night was the kind people dream of as kids -- the homer brought the Astros from behind to win. The shot gives Lee four homers and 11 RBI in his last nine games; his summer fat is clearly in full giggle now.
ONE GUY WHO ISN'T EVEN GOOD ENOUGH TO DISPLACE A CFL PLAYER IN THE TOP THREE:
DANNY AINGE -- We know everyone is saying the exact same stuff about Ainge right now, but we can't let Ainge off the hook for being crappy just because we want to avoid being unoriginal.
The Celtics general manager couldn't land a true superstar in a deal -- as K.G. and company apparently equate Boston with Hell -- but still felt compelled to deal the fifth pick in the NBA draft for Ray Allen and his wonky ankles. Ainge's deal is amazingly Fergusonesque, and done for the same reason... to appease a restless fanbase and save his job with a Band-Aid that'll bring a few more wins, not another championship.